Being Coworkers with Your Anxiety

    Wowza.

    Coming back to your blog after not posting for over a year can feel strangely intimidating. I feel like I have to write something absolutely impeccable. But instead of focusing on that, I'm just going to write out my new ideas and mindsets that help me and hopefully, will help others.

    My topic for today is 'Being Coworkers with Your Anxiety'. This will make more sense soon, I promise. 

    Over my years of struggling with an anxiety disorder and going to therapy, I've developed a lot of skills and tactics to help me through the tough times. But sometimes, things happen and those strategies are harder to remember or use. A healthy mindset is sometimes harder to regularly maintain. 

    And that's okay. I want you to keep that in mind.

   The point of this particular blog post is that I wanted to share some things that have brought me comfort throughout my time with anxiety, and one new concept I've come up with is being "coworkers" with it. This isn't a way of letting the anxiety have control over you, but recognizing it as something you experience and there's ways you can help the experience be more positive. I would not advise giving the "coworker" an actual name, because anxiety is still not a living being who's actively trying to hold you back from things, and we don't want to build it into a living thing, do we?

    When I say coworker, think of it as a sort of manager and employee situation, You're the manager, and anxiety is your employee. Sometimes a really sucky one. You're in charge, and finding ways you can work with your anxiety to make situations with anxiety as well as experiences in day-to-day life easier and more manageable is the idea.

    I'm going to pull examples from my life and, seeing as many people who struggle with an anxiety disorder tend to deal with similar situations, these will hopefully speak to you. 

    I get anxiety going to unfamiliar places or being around unfamiliar people. The unknown is my biggest enemy. So in the situation of going somewhere I've never been with people I don't know that well, my first step is recognizing that anxiety is there. Then I move forward with "working" with it. 

    One of the first things I often do is reach out to the people I'm going to be with at that place. I let them know that I deal with some anxiety and if there's ever a time where I need to step away to take a breather, they shouldn't worry too much and I'll be okay. Just having others aware is incredibly comforting, and I haven't encountered a single soul rude enough to be a jerk about it. Surround yourself with good people who take time to listen and be aware and help if needed.

    My next step would be bringing a bag that has several necessities in it, kind of like a go-to anxiety help kit. My items include a source of water (preferably kept cold), a small towel or rag, small snacks, and small plastic bags. Water helps you stay hydrated and helps your body and mind run at a healthy rate. It also helps with keeping cool, especially if you're somewhere where it's hot. My anxiety really affects my body temperature, so the small towel or rag helps as you can get it slightly wet and use it to cool down (putting it on the back of my neck is always really nice).

    Small snacks, such as granola bars, fruit snacks, crackers, or other little things are nice to have close. Anxiety affects my stomach terribly, and a lot of the time I don't feel an appetite for anything when feeling anxious. Small snacks that are easy on the stomach come in handy when dealing with this. In addition, because anxiety can worry me to the point of getting sick, bringing the small plastic bags is a good thing to have in case my stomach decides to reject something as a result of nerves. I've dealt with throwing up in inconvenient places many times, which has caused me to develop emetophobia, and being prepared eases my anxiety more and helps combat it from happening.

    Other ways to work with your anxiety outside of helpful items is to study your surroundings. Usually when I go somewhere, I like figuring out where restrooms and exits are. A part of my 'unfamiliar places' fear is not knowing if I'll be able to escape if needed (otherwise known as agoraphobia), so I've trained myself to always scan the area for places I can retreat to in case anxiety tries to make an appearance. If you're not familiar with the place, become familiar with it. If you're not necessarily close with the people you're with but you want to be comfortable with them, be honest, open, and yourself. Closing others off and feeling upset at yourself for feeling the way you do is not the way to go, I can assure you. 

    Being coworkers with your anxiety is a learning-curve, just as it is with real-life coworkers. But with your anxiety, you're always the boss. You are not your anxiety. And you can work with it.

    As a side-note, if you're a parent to an anxious child, find out what helps them and be sure to have those items or tips and tricks handy at all times. Do mental health check-ins. Help them work with their anxiety and keep them in the boss's seat. 

    Accepting that anxiety is a part of who you are can be as easy, but the hard part finding the drive and strategies to make things easier for yourself when dealing with it. Wouldn't it just be easier to lay in bed all day and not do anything that could possibly cause you anxiety? Maybe sometimes it seems that way, but at that point, you're surviving, not living.

    It takes effort and motivation to find what works for you. Maybe my tips will be useful or maybe not, but take opportunities and learn what makes things easier for you in positive and healthy ways. Having anxiety as a coworker is not ideal, but working and living with it is possible. In addition, I think this strategy helps normalize anxiety/mental health care for you and others, and that takes away a ton of negativity and complications with it.

    With that being said, if you struggle with anxiety... looks like you have a new coworker to meet. 

    All the very best,

    Joely.